tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5103996349268714640.post4443810556441535419..comments2023-11-05T07:41:35.241-05:00Comments on A Place to Write Things: Five Things You Probably Shouldn't Say to the Parent of a Kid with Special Needs - January 18, 2011Marlahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16809949267562980590noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5103996349268714640.post-51824450351021108552011-02-07T10:55:26.262-05:002011-02-07T10:55:26.262-05:00One of my favorites always was: "Well, you kn...One of my favorites always was: "Well, you know Einstein didn't talk until he was 4." (followed by a look signifying that they were CERTAIN that they were reassuring me with a fact I'd never, ever heard before.)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5103996349268714640.post-69608233745219227382011-01-20T13:47:32.810-05:002011-01-20T13:47:32.810-05:00Thank you for the post. As the mother of two kids ...Thank you for the post. As the mother of two kids on the spectrum and a bipolar toddler i'd like to add "S/he doesn't seem ____ to ME"<br /><br />("well YOU don't seem like a doctor of _____ to me!")<br /><br />*grumble grumble*<br /><br />oh and I second lemniskate's addition. "Have you tried _____" makes me want to scream. Especially since I'm one of those mothers that I probably DID try it. I'm quite a bit more skeptical now.smibbo conspiracyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13557823986600698576noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5103996349268714640.post-68473248428671097632011-01-18T11:29:42.586-05:002011-01-18T11:29:42.586-05:00I couldn't agree more. Throw in, "Have y...I couldn't agree more. Throw in, "Have you tried _____" and fill in the blank with whatever random and almost always non-scientific quackery that's come up in the news that's supposed to be a miracle cure. Sorry, I'm long past the stage of putting my son through whatever is the latest misery-causing regimen that doesn't do any good in the end. And you know what? It doesn't make me a bad mom!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5103996349268714640.post-39242967003958801082011-01-18T10:19:45.327-05:002011-01-18T10:19:45.327-05:00I agree with Chrissi and "Will they outgrow i...I agree with Chrissi and "Will they outgrow it?" Or "Maybe some exercises will fix him."<br /><br />I'm also tired of people just assuming my son is mentally challenged. He also has CP, due to PVL. There'd be nothing wrong with it if he were, but it's an ignorant thing to say. If I hop on Facebook and brag about how he said a sentence, it's not because it's a miracle. I'm just a proud mama. Say "Aww, cute!" and move on.<br /><br />Lastly, I don't need someone that doesn't even know what his condition is exactly telling me to put him in a walker (like the kind for infants, not the kind for special needs people)or some other contraption and he'll be all better.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5103996349268714640.post-43908043490667942212011-01-18T10:06:37.354-05:002011-01-18T10:06:37.354-05:00Can I add one to the list? "Will they outgrow...Can I add one to the list? "Will they outgrow it?" Umm, no, Gabe is not going to outgrow his spina bifida and I'd appreciate it if you'd quit asking.<br /><br />People are so incredibly ignorant.Witkowski Familyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16885350800154175798noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5103996349268714640.post-62501473859035826022011-01-18T10:02:24.364-05:002011-01-18T10:02:24.364-05:00This is a terrific blog post. I often wonder why ...This is a terrific blog post. I often wonder why people can't seem to use the edit button between their brains and their mouth. Basic etiquette and common courtesy. <br /><br />My daughter has mild sensory processing disorder, which is neurological in origin. Here's the textbook definition: “Sensory processing (sometimes called "sensory integration" or SI) is a term that refers to the way the nervous system receives messages from the senses and turns them into appropriate motor and behavioral responses.” In her case, it means she either intensely craves or has intense aversions to certain stimuli. <br /><br />It was diagnosed when her pediatrician referred her for PT for her tiptoe walking and difficulty navigating stairs. Everyone thinks the tiptoe walking is cute: "Oh look, I bet she's going to be a ballerina!" I also tiptoe walked as a child(and eventually -mostly - corrected my gait) but I can tell you it's nothing but cute. I still have trouble placing my foot completely flat on hard surfaces, and the years of walking incorrectly caused hip and sacrum issues. My daughter is already presenting with nearly identical issues, as our chiropractor noted. <br /><br />As she gets older, other SPD issues are presenting themselves - responses to stimuli completely out of proportion to what would seem "normal." She has difficulty with making transitions and often has trouble settling down if she gets wound up. She's almost 4 and often still needs to be rocked at night in order to relax enough for sleep. (As an infant, she needed near-constant movement in order to sleep, which is vestibular in origin.) She intensely dislikes having her hair brushed and toothbrushing was a huge battle for a long time. <br /><br />This may not seem like that big of a deal, but for parents of children with moderate to severe SPD (one of my friends has a child with this, which is how I was clued in to my own child's behavior) it can be very challenging, because the aversion/need issues are more intense. For example, a child who needs more physical stimulus can be a terror on the playground with other kids (bumping, crashing, fighting) or hurt themselves.<br /><br />In any case, I do understand why you get tired of explaining things to people you don't know all that well. On some level, it feels judgmental, like we did something "wrong" because our kids have issues that make them somehow different. It's as if they're not seeing the kids themselves, but their behaviors. <br /><br />You're doing an awesome job with your daughter. Don't let anyone ever make you feel different. And she is an awesome, perfect little individual just as she is. :)Dana Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17641855084825699070noreply@blogger.com